I am a Filipina

I am the wife and the virgin
I am the mother and the daughter
I am the arms of my mother
I am barren and my children are many
I am the married woman and the spinster
I am the woman who gives birth and she who never procreated
I am the consolation of the pain of birth
I am the wife and the husband
And it was my man who created me
I am the mother of my father
I am the sister of my husband
And he is my rejected son
Always respect me
For I am the shameful and the magnificent one……


- 3rd or 4th century B.C., from the Nag Hammadi documents


The poem is an excerpt from the Hymn to Isis. Isis is a prominent goddess in Egyptian mythology. A goddess of rebirth, she remains to be one of the most known images of utter femininity and empowered women. Every inch a woman. Isis embodies the strengths of the feminine, the capacity to feel deeply about relationships, the act of creation, and the source of sustenance and protection.

Beautiful. This was the first thought that came to my mind after reading the Hymn to Isis. Zoe gave the poem to me. Zoe is a friend whose passion for literary works and historical imaginations has given her a special place in my heart. Despite of the thousand miles that separate us, we never fail to keep in touch with each other. With the passage of time our friendship grows like the flower that blooms in the garden. Reminding ourselves that we must continuously live for others to show that life is beautiful despite of everything.

For Joyce, for being a woman like me. Short but meaningful, those simple words of dedication from her made me realize that this friend of mine has come a long way from her journey in life. No longer the uncertain and almost clueless girl that I met during my first year in college, she has emerged from her cocoon like a butterfly in a metamorphosis. I have known her story and I know life hasn't been easy for her. She has earned my admiration not only because she is a good friend but more importantly because she is an example of the few women I know who always stand tall with their head high in times of adversities in life. Never losing the courage and faith in their self and to the Man above.

Well-endowed and beautiful in her long curly hair, she exhibits a picture of femininity that has long earned admiring stares from men. Gentle in character yet she speaks with that great conviction about things that truly matters to her. Family, society and life in general. She has her own mind about almost everything under the sun. She married early but she confessed to have never regretted this decision. She has chosen a different path from us when she decided to marry her knight and forego the chance to be a career woman. When the rest of us are busy pursuing our master's degree and PhD, she is also busy pursuing a different kind of graduate studies, only this time with diapers, teething problems and marital blues. Despite of these things,however, she continues to believe in the beauty of her dreams. After all these years, she has not given up the idea of writing her ideas down and have them published. Tom, her husband, has been supportive all the time. She would often mused that to me. And in times like these I would always smile and just be completely happy for my friend. I guess, she has found her place under the sun.

Women have always held places of honor in ancient history. We have goddesses that personify the attributes of beauty, intelligence and courage. In the days when history was recounted around the family fires, people worshiped a supreme female creator. Beginning with the Neolithic period around 7000 b.c., women, revered as wise, valiant, powerful, just, and immortal, were honored.

They were called by many names, including the Great Goddess, Divine Ancestress, Mother Goddess, Creatress of Life, Mistress of Heaven, Our Lady, and High Priestess.

The female's ability to produce a child made her the object of the male's worship; women were the magical birth-givers and breast-feeders who nurtured the young. These words from Sandra Fold Walston's "Courage: Heart and Spirit of Every Woman", illustrates how some of us today have forgotten the beautiful gift of giving life. Not every woman can actually say that she has the privilege to experience both the pain and joy of giving birth. It is always an honor for a woman to be a mother. I think it is one of the most wonderful personifications of femininity. Zoe and all the women like her have shown that to me.

With a radiant smile on her face, she would always say that being married to a wonderful man and having kids are one of her greatest achievements in life. Now, how many women could actually say that? Because of this she has earned my utmost respect. Maybe she has chosen a different path from mine. But her faith in herself and the way she stands firm with her decisions in life are traits that makes her as a a woman of substance. Zoe is married to an Austrian and this simple fact often becomes the source of discrimination against her. She has often been accused of marrying her husband as a ticket out of poverty. Simply absurd if you ask me. She belongs to a prominent family and is a graduate of a well-respected university in the country. There are people who think (foreigners and sadly yes, Filipinos, too) that Filipino women who are married to foreigners are gold diggers. If I may say, some of us are just ignorant fools.

In the eyes of other people,Zoe is maybe an ordinary housewife. But she’s the best mom any child could wish for and the best wife a man could ever have. I am not saying this because I’m her friend. But her loyalty and devotion to her family is simply amazing. In everything she do, she do it with much love and affection. A fact that brings into mind the importance of family in the Philippine culture. Many women have decided to give up their careers and invest their time and energies in rearing their families. If that is their choice, who are we to question it? If we are proud of those women who made a name for themselves in fields dominated by males, why can't we be equally proud for those who have chosen a different path? I come from the opposite pole but I have never looked down on women who have opted to travel the road to motherhood and exchange their wonderful careers for it.

Sometimes some of us think that a woman could only be successful if she makes a name for herself in areas where men have dominated. Truth be told, yes, this maybe the trend. But there are other ways to show them that we are NOT just sugar and spice and everything nice.

Behind every great woman is herself. In many ways, the phrase captures the essence of being a woman in the Philippine society. At times, it is tough to go against the glass ceilings and having to deal with the multiple burdens. However, I have met quite a number of our own empowered women who were never afraid to go against the grain. Physically, emotionally and spiritually beautiful. Witty. Wise. Empowered. Because of them, I have always been proud to say I am a Filipina. . With all the Filipina mail order brides and porn sites in the internet, I still stand firm to my belief that our women are not just easy on the eyes. We have real brains and character to reckon with. It's not enough for us to say that we are proud to be Pinays. We should act on it. We should walk the talk. Those words become meaningless if other people cannot find something noteworthy about us.

This is not something new. Filipino women are regarded with respect as our history would tell us. Our pre-colonial social structure gave equal importance to maternal and paternal lineage. This bilateral kinship system accorded our women enormous power. Egalitarian relationship existed between the native Filipino men and women. Male and female offspring were both regarded as an important part of the family. Women had an honored position in the society which had been disregarded with the coming of the colonizers.

Like the woman that Isis portrays, women's multiple roles in the society are reflections of their resiliency and flexibility in the face of adversities as well as their power to breathe life and color in this earth. It’s not basically the question of who welds power over whom or who is the stronger sex or what have you. In the end, it all boils down to the concept of making choices that truly empowers an individual. A conscious choice that brings out the best in us and makes us a nation of people who are proud of our women and our culture.

I am a Filipina and I’m proud of it.

Habagat, Bulan, Amihan: What’s in A Name?

Amihan. Habagat. I don’t know why I like these names so much. Maybe because I am a historian and an artist by heart. Or maybe because I am truly proud to be a Filipino. Before, I told my friends that someday I would name my daughter Merry Ligaya Joy. And her nickname would be “Happy”. I tend to view life with that positive outlook. We only live once, so we better make the most out of it. Isn’t it cute? MERRY LIGAYA JOY. I bet she will never get the feeling that I have forsaken her. Okay. Don’t give me that look. I am joking.

What’s in a name? A lot, I guess. Kidlat. Daguob. Makisig. Amihan. Habagat. Nobody would say it’s of western influence. My name is undeniably of Western origin. Until now, I never get to ask my parents about this. There are a lot of women in this world named Joyce. Not to mention that my name is too long. Maybe when I was in Grade I, I must have missed the first questions in my exams because I have to write my complete name. Once, while surfing the net, I come across an article about a woman who was a victim of a heinous crime. Exactly. You’re right. Quite different but the spellings are exactly the same. Heaven forbids.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not writing this because I am not satisfied with my name. My parents gave it to me with good intentions. Otherwise they could have given me the name, “Kutimoy” because I am a premature baby. However, there are times when I wished that some of us should think twice before we christen our children with names that sounded like a curse from nowhere.

I wanted something that is unique. Something different. Something exotic. Not ordinary. So I wrack my brain for a good one. That’s how it all started. Amihan and Habagat were born while listening to the radio about the weather one evening. Amihan for a daughter and Habagat for a son. Bagani. Bagwis. Magayon. Lin-ay. Bulan. Bituin. Bulak. The list goes on and on. And why not? I have always been proud to be a Filipino. I wear it like a crown. In fact, I wear it like no other.

I wanted my children to learn the tales of Mariang Makiling, Pedro Penduko and the likes. Before they read Nancy Drew, The Hardy Boys or Jane Austen, they must learn to appreciate Ibong Adarna, Florante at Laura, Noli Me Tangere and El Filibusterismo. They must learn to hum and eventually sing the songs of the EDSA Revolution. Explore Philippines and Asia before they decide to take a vacation somewhere in Europe or the United States.

Serve their country. Enjoy and appreciate their own culture.

A friend laughed when I told her about this. I know there is nothing funny about the names. As a historian, I truly believe that giving such a Filipino sounding name is the way to go. I advocate it. There is nothing wrong with it. In the future, if I name my son Kidlat and my daughter Ma-anyag, so what? Being agile and beautiful are wonderful qualities. But just don’t overdo it. A friend of mine suggested names such as Talahib, Kulunaknit, Pagong, Palito, Tabatsoy, Budyawi and Bangenge. You don’t want your children to curse you, don’t you? Fine. They sound truly Filipino. However, envision your children’s future 10 to 15 years from now. They will be the butt of jokes somehow among their classmates. And certainly you don’t want your children to live up to such names.

Don’t name them Mamon, Kapog or Monay simply because you love to eat these foods. Or much worst name your child Pancit, Hototay or Batchoy because it smells and sounds so good. Maybe I am exaggerating. But I am truly honest when I tell you that I know somebody named as “Kapog”. The poor girl has to live with the name for the rest of her life.

I must also admit. I have my own secret to reveal. No. I was not named as Soup Number Five or Dinuguan, some of my parents’ favorite foods. Rather I was given the nickname of “Agok”. I am a sickly child before. I suffered from bouts of asthma attacks. Until now, sometimes I still do. Sisigok-sigok. That was how it all started. In the end, “Agok” was born. It might sound cute for someone who doesn’t have a single idea about it. But I’m telling you. Don’t you dare call me by that name. I am kind to animals. But in times like these, well, I think it pays to know a little about karate. Now here’s the tricky part. What if your partner doesn’t agree with you? Simple. Merry Ligaya Joy or Amihan? Choose the latter. Take it or leave it.

So, what’s in a name? A lot. Choose carefully. Think not just once. Not twice. But a number of times before you decide. The stakes are high. Eventually you’ll learn that your children will be thankful that you have chosen the right names for them.

Wanted: Pambansang Bayani ng Pilipinas

Little acts of heroism in our time is often ridiculed as outmoded. Often we assume we are too young or too old to become heroes

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Profound 'di ba? This is a quotation I have read six years ago sa aming paper. Medyo matagal na rin yun pero hindi pa rin mapagkit sa aking isipan hanggang ngayon. Naaalala ko 'to sa tuwing nakikita ko ang mga pagpupugay at pagbibigay galang ng ating mga Presidente tuwing araw ng mga bayani. Nakakalungkot isipin na parang wala nang halaga ang mga okasyong ito para sa isang ordinaryong Pilipino. Oo nga nman di ba? How can you think of these celebrations kung wala ka ngang pagkain na mailagay sa hapag-kainan mo, walang damit, hindi makapag-aral at walang trabaho. Mataas na ang presyo ng mga bilihin ngayon. Wala na yatang libre. There's no such thing as a free lunch. Lahat may kaakibat na presyo.

Iisipin mo pa ba si Rizal o si Bonifacio na baka magtampo kasi hindi mo naalala ang kaarawan o kamatayan nila? Syempre hindi. Siguro maintindihan ng ating mga bayani kung bakit sa bawat taong pagbibigay pugay, ilan sa mga mamamayang Pilipino ay hindi makaalala sa kanila, abala sa paghahanap buhay para may maipakain at maitaguyod ang kinabukasan ng sariling pamilya. Wala namang masama dun eh. We are living in a society which is family-oriented. Pero minsan, tuluyan na nga talaga tayong nakalimot sa mga bagay na may koneksyon sa ating nakaraan. Sabi pa ng bestpren ko, nagka-Alzheimer's disease na yata ang ilan sa atin. Gayunpaman, sabihin man ng ibang tao na walang kwenta pang pag-usapan ang mga nakarran, na wag na natin pang buhayin ang mga patay, let them rest 'ika nga. Baka kasi tuluyan nang bumangon si Joe at Bonnie nito pag nagkataon. Naniniwala pa rin akong marami tayong makukuhang mahahalagang aral sa ating kasaysayan.

Sino si Rizal? Sino si Bonifacio? May katuturan pa ba ang mga taong ito para sa isang karaniwang Pilipino? Ni hindi nga alam ng ilan sa atin kung sino nga ba talaga si Bonifacio at Rizal. Ang masaklap pa nito, lagi nating inihahambing ang dalawa. Uso pa ba sila? Tama na! Sobra na! Ito ang sigaw ng utak mo. Isipin mo na lang ha? Mula grade one yata hanggang kolehiyo magkasama kayo nina Rizal at Bonifacio sa paaralan. Sukang-suka ka na sa kwento ng buhay nila. Tapos si Maam, ang lupit!!! Walang awa kung gumawa ng exam, dapat i-memorize mo lahat, kulang na lang yata pati kulay ng paboritong brief ni Rizal itatanong pa sayo. Tuloy nung graduation, naipangako mo sa iyong sarili na putulin na ang ugnayan mo sa kanilang dalawa. Tama na yung minsang nasaktan ka. Buong gabi mong tinutukan yung RA 1425, tapos itlog lang pala yung magiging score mo sa exam. Masakit di ba? Ngunit ngayon, pagkalipas ng maraming taon, heto ka't nagbabasa tungkol sa kanila. Ang buhay nga naman ano?

Sino ba si Rizal? Sino ba si Bonifacio? Bayani ba kamo? Sinong bayani ha? Bayani Agbayani? Bayani Fernando? Fernando Poe? Aaaahhhh!!! Hindi mo na maalala ano? Sige, tumingin ka sa iyong paligid. Nakikita mo ba ang lalakeng nakasuot ng camisa de chino, may dalang itak na animo'y laging handa para makipaglaban? "Sugod mga kapatid!" Mga katagang hindi mo malilimutan habang ika'y nakatingin sa bantayog ni Ka Andres. Ito ang ating pangkaraniwang paglalarawan sa kanya.Stereotype image. Ngunit teka muna, nausubukan mo na bang itanong sa iyong titser noon na kung pagbibigyan ng pagkakataon, ano kaya ang gustong sandata ni Bonifacio, itak ba o baril? Ang walang kamatayang itak laban sa baril.... HIndi ka si Pilosopo Tasyo ngunit marahil alam mo ang sagot dito.


Pag-isipan mong mabuti, paano kung isang araw sa iyong paglalakad nakita mo si Bonifacio, ang tangan niya'y baril at hindi itak, makisig sa suot na barong tagalog at nakapantalon, suot ay sapatos? Tingnan mo ang monumentong ginawa ni Guillermo Tolentino, ang taong naglilok at humubog kay Oble, naiiba hindi ba? Makisig sa suot na barong tagalog, sa kaliwang kamay ay isang revolver at sa kanan nman ay isang itak. Hindi ko nga lang alam kung alin sa Mausser at Remington ang pipiliin niya. Marahil marami pa tayong hindi alam sa buhay ng ating mga bayani. Masyadong mataas ang tingin natin sa kanila, na talaga namang karapat-dapat ngunit wag sana nating kalimutan na sila'y tao rin. May mga pagkakataong mainit ang ulo, kumakain ng tuyo at sardinas( isa sa mga paborito ni Rizal), marunong tumawa, nagkakaroon ng utang, naglalasing, nagmamahal at nasasawi rin sa pag-ibig. Mga karaniwang tao ngunit sa kabila ng lahat ng kanilang mga pagkukulang, pagkakamali at kapintasan, natutong bumangon at nakita ang paghihirap ng bayan.

Ngayon, bilang isang Pilipino sana maisip natin na sa kabila ng pagiging karaniwang tao, tayo ay may kakayahan na maging bayani sa ating munting paraan.